Anyway, they say
the black hole doesn’t care what part of the identical is the same.
If I vomit out all
that I’m hiding within my body,
turn my skin outward,
let the caustic outside burn away the keratin,
what’s left
could hardly
be called living tissue –
rather a personified epithelium of emptiness,
a porous perimeter of nothing,
thinner than the thinnest meaning,
quieter than the quietest tone,
louder than identity itself.
If someday I do somehow manage
to vomit out everything inside my stomach,
I’ll therefore also vomit out the stomach in the process.
My scattered nature will die again and again,
being born repeatedly, but just in foreign bodies,
as a profoundly adaptable illusion of epidemic proportions,
a centrifugal centre,
aggressive passivity,
a drowned metaphor,
an air bubble at the bottom of an ocean of stone,
the forgettable hue of the print of all the world's newspapers.
The only thing that will remain
is a description, a metonymy of presence,
without scent or taste,
thoroughly superficial,
undigestible,
undecomposable,
inarticulate,
and unsigned.
Sicer pa pravijo,
da črni luknji ni mar za odstotek istega v enakem.
Če bom izbruhal vse,
kar skrivam v telesu,
če bom kožo obrnil navzven
in bo jedka zunanjost temeljito izlužila roževino,
se bo to,
kar bo ostalo,
le še stežka imenovalo živo tkivo,
morda raje poosebljena povrhnjica praznine,
porozna meja ničesar,
tanjša od najtanjšega pomena,
tišja od najtišjega tona,
glasnejša od istovetnosti same.
Če mi bo torej nekoč vendarle nekako uspelo
izbruhati vso vsebino želodca,
bom s tem izbruhal tudi želodec sam.
Moja razpršenost bo znova in znova umrla,
ker se bo znova in znova rodila le še v tujih telesih
kot skrajno prilagodljiva utvara epidemičnih razsežnosti,
sredobežno središče,
agresivna pasivnost,
utopljena prispodoba,
mehurček zraka na dnu kamnitega oceana,
zanemarljiv odtenek barve tiska vseh časopisov sveta.
Kar bo ostalo,
bo zgolj metonmičen opis prisotnosti
brez pravega vonja in okusa,
skrajno površinski,
neprebavljiv,
nerazgradrljiv,
neartikuliran
in nepodpisan